So this is where you live, and you still had the nerve to ask me out? Do you think I date broke men? [laughter]
Isabella, this guy has no shame.
Isabella, that’s not fair. Please, sir, forgive my friend. She’s not always like this.
Rita, why are you apologizing? I know you like broke men, so you can have him. Joy, let’s go.
Please, sir, forgive my friend. She’s not always like this.
It’s okay, Rita. Don’t mind your friends. Would you like to have a glass of juice at my house?
Sure. I’d love to see what kind of palace this is.
I can’t believe this. [music]
Have a seat.
Oh, wow. They say never judge a book by its cover. Gold can hide in old wrappers. I was looking for a woman who would value my heart, not my riches.
Ethan, this house is incredible. I didn’t know you were this rich. Isabella will regret it when she finds out.
Can we stop talking about Isabella? Let’s talk about us. Will you be my girlfriend?
Ethan, I really like you, but you know how Isabella is. She’s my best friend. How will she feel if she finds out?
Rita, don’t worry. Isabella already gave her blessing. She said we fit each other better.
But she said that because she thought you were broke.
Do you like me?
Yes.
That’s all that matters. Please don’t tell Isabella I’m rich. I want this to stay between us for now. Come, let me escort you home. We’ll tell Isabella we’re together now, but what you saw here stays between us. Let her keep thinking I’m just some broke guy.
Okay. I won’t tell her.
I’m glad you said yes.
Me too.
Let’s get a keke. Take us to Insina Street.
It’s 300 naira per person.
Okay, let’s go.
Kelly, look. This luxury store is doing a 70% discount tomorrow. Designer bags for real. Imagine me carrying fake bags when originals are on discount. Soft life season. [laughter]
But wait, why is Rita taking so long in that broke guy’s house? What could they be discussing? I hope she didn’t fall for that slum guy.
Rita is a cheap girl. She wouldn’t mind dating a beggar.
Why did you stay so long? What was going on with you and Ethan?
He asked me to be his girlfriend.
Wait, are you serious, Rita? You and this broke guy? [laughter]
So, because I didn’t accept you, you went to ask my friend out? See, the two of you fit each other. My friend here is always the understanding girlfriend. She has never had a rich man, so of course she’ll stay with you. But not me. I can’t lower my standards for a man like you. I deal with men who fly me out, men who have cars, men who take me places. I am Isabella. I don’t do broke guys. So have fun, slum guy and lover girl. [laughter]
It’s all right, Isabella. You rejected me, and Rita accepted me. That’s all that matters. Thank you for accepting me, my love. I’ll come back to check on you.
Rita, why did you date that broke guy in the name of love? Hunger will punish you in this school.
Don’t mind them. She’s forming lover girl.
You girls won’t kill me.
Ethan is really sweet to me.
Sweet? Please. You mean broke?
Let’s be real. He can’t even afford anything.
Exactly. That’s why I said no to him. Meanwhile, I got a call from Mr. Richard last night. He wants to take me out tonight. Joy, you should come with me. We’re going somewhere nice.
Ah, yes.
Let’s leave Rita with her slum romance. If my man cannot spoil me, what’s the point? [laughter]
Look at this girl on TikTok. Her boyfriend surprised her with an iPhone 17. That’s what I call relationship goals. Not “I love you” inside a slum. [laughter]
You people judge too much. Ethan is kind.
Can kindness buy wigs? Can kindness fund soft life? [laughter]
Everything is not money.
Speak for yourself. I was not born to suffer romantically. I date bank alerts.
Oh, he’s calling. Put it on speaker.
Hello.
Hello, sweetheart. Hope you’re dressed. I’ll be there in 30 minutes.
Okay, dear.
Should I wear this?
Yes, that looks good. I’ll put on a red dress. I want to look hot.
Girly, look hot.
Richard has rich friends.
You know it. Rita, come.
Come where? Please leave Rita. She’s loyal to poverty.
No, I’ll stay and read for my test.
Soft life is calling.
It’s Ethan.
Hello, Ethan. Good evening.
Hello, girlfriend. How are you?
I’m fine. And you?
Can we go on a date today?
Let it be tomorrow. I’m preparing for a test.
Okay, my serious-minded girlfriend. Where would you like me to take you tomorrow? Somewhere simple and nice?
What about your roommates? Are they in?
No, they stepped out.
Hope they are no longer mocking you for accepting me.
Don’t mind those girls. I’m used to them already.
Okay. Let me allow you to concentrate. See you tomorrow.
Okay, Ethan. Bye.
Bye.
It’s 11:30 p.m. and these girls are still not back. Let me call Joy.
Hello, Joy.
Rita, just close the door and sleep. We’re coming back tomorrow.
Imagine this. I’m so tired. [music]
Rita, shift a little and witness soft life. See this bag? Original. Mr. Richard doesn’t joke. Babe, this is rich-girl starter pack. And this was just the first outing. [laughter]
First outing? Imagine month two.
Your slum guy can’t even buy lip gloss. Don’t disrespect gala romance. [laughter]
First outing. This is why I don’t date broke men. One proper outing and look at me glowing. Soft life is not by prayer. It’s by connection.
When you’re done, I have a test today.
Rita, be honest. If Ethan had money, would you still be acting humble?
I want to get ready for school.
Ah, slum guy has come. Where is he taking lover girl? Roadside pepper soup joint? Maybe that’s his date budget.
At least it’s romance. [laughter]
Can you afford proper dates?
Don’t worry, your friend is in good hands.
[laughter] Your confidence is from broke-boy headquarters.
How do you survive those girls?
I’m used to them. We all came from struggle. None of us is rich. Some people just package more.
If you want, I can get you your own apartment.
No. If they know who you really are now, Isabella will fight me. She’ll say I snatched her boyfriend, even though she rejected you. Let them keep thinking you’re poor.
I really love this game.
This is the best eatery in town. Their food is superb.
Have you been here before?
No, this is my first time.
You’re going to love it.
I can’t wait.
Apart from reading and being the calm one in that house, who is Rita really?
I don’t know. I think I’m just simple.
What do you really want from a man?
I want peace. A good man who will not stress me.
You’re not looking for a man who will give you soft life? No luxury dreams?
If it comes, fine. But I don’t want to lose myself chasing it.
You’re good and smart. I’ll make your friends jealous of you.
Do you mind buying takeaways so I can share with my roommates when I get home?
No way. Me, a broke man? Your friends already know I’m broke. They won’t expect anything from me.
You are so funny.
No way. I’m serious.
Dinner Street.
Okay, it’s 500 naira.
Okay. Thank you. Bye.
Look who is back from her date. She came back empty-handed. Not even ice cream, not even takeaway. We came back with bags. You came back with only love. [laughter]
Leave me alone. I enjoyed myself.
Doing what? Walking around with a broke boyfriend? What do you gain dating poor men? Rita, you need sense.
Let me go and see Chief. No time to check time.
Isabella, do you ever get tired?
No.
Rita, there’s a big party tonight. I’d like you to come with us.
I’m reading for exams.
Stop being boring and enjoy your life. We only live once.
I prefer my boring life.
This girl and books. All you do is party. You don’t read even when exams are around the corner.
Rita, not all students need to stress. We have our ways.
Yes, Rita. Just because you study doesn’t mean we can’t pass. One day your books will marry you. [laughter]
This is fun. [screaming]
Hello, ladies. You look beautiful.
Thank you, sir.
My friend and I would like your company. We’ll treat you well.
Okay, sir.
Have you noticed Rita smiles a lot these days?
I noticed. Look at her blushing.
Who are you chatting with?
My boyfriend.
Your slum guy?
His name is Ethan.
She’s in love. What exactly attracted you to that broke man?
Maybe things you people cannot see.
See mystery woman. Love has turned her into a poet.
You’re trying to distract me from my food.
Maybe I just like your attention more than the menu. Or maybe I like both.
That’s why I like spending on you.
My Odogwu, I like the way you spoil me.
So what happens when I’m not around?
That’s a problem for future me. Right now, I’m enjoying present you.
You’re a Gen Z baddie with soft lips and expensive taste.
Call me Isabella the baddie.
So it’s true that you always come here.
Amaka, please don’t cause a scene. Eat.
Look at your father. He says there’s no money for food, but he’s here enjoying himself with another woman.
What is happening?
I am his wife. And if I catch you near my husband again, I will deal with you. God will judge you, Richard.
Girly, trouble has burst.
What happened?
Richard’s wife showed up in the restaurant with their son. I’ve never been so embarrassed.
Did you know he was married?
Yes. I like married men. They spend. I just didn’t expect the wife to show up.
You mean you knew?
Of course. Poor single men stress too much. Rich married men spend.
Hey, besties, do you think I should leave my Odogwu, Mr. Richard, who spoils me, just because his wife came with one scene?
It’s Richard. Put it on speaker. Let’s hear what he has to say.
Isabella, please. I’m really sorry about what happened yesterday. My wife had no right to embarrass you like that.
Sorry? That’s all you have to say? You think that was a small thing?
Tell me what you want. Anything. I’ll fix it.
You want forgiveness? Then you’ll pay for it.
Okay. How much is this forgiveness?
Five hundred thousand.
